


Halloween Tricks

by jujukittychick



Series: Tricks & Treats [1]
Category: The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Gen, Kid!vengers, Missions Gone Wrong, Phil is so done
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-17
Updated: 2020-11-17
Packaged: 2021-03-10 03:55:55
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 666
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27597194
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jujukittychick/pseuds/jujukittychick
Summary: After a mishap on a mission, Phil is left with 5 tiny (huge) problems on his hands.
Series: Tricks & Treats [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2017547
Comments: 2
Kudos: 20
Collections: 1 Million Words' BINGO





	Halloween Tricks

**Author's Note:**

> for Fall Bingo at LJ’s 1_million_words and the card [I picked](https://jujukittychick.livejournal.com/48285.html), Halloween & Horror #2 - prompts Babysitting Alone, Something in the Air, Mad Scientist, and Aliens. As soon as I saw these prompts I had poor Coulson going through my head, so here we go with tiny!vengers lol

Phil Coulson enjoyed his job most days. He found a sense of accomplishment in ensuring that the teams under his command, directly or through another agent, were able to perform their tasks to the best of their abilities. The fact that most of the time, recently, those tasks generally involved saving a whole country, if not the whole world, from one mad scientist or another, only added to those feelings after it was all said and done.

Today? Today was not one of those days.

“No, you look, Nick...I don’t care what the camera feed showed...That’s completely beside the point!” A tugging on his pants leg made him look down at the sweetly innocent face of one six years old Bruce Banner.

Voice soft and even more timid than when he was a full sized adult, the little boy looked completely pitiful. “I have to go potty.”

“I...yes, of course you do. Do any of the rest of you need to go to the...potty?” Phil Coulson, wrangler of secret agents, spies, and superheroes, looked at the group of five little children, formerly said superheroes, in front of him and wondered what he’d done to deserve this kind of torture. Leading the children of various ages, thankfully all old enough to more or less care for their basic needs, to the nearest restroom inside the Shield safehouse they’d taken refuge in, Coulson checked to make sure the call to Fury was still connected. “Nick? Stop laughing, this is serious...No, I’m not sending you pictures! Listen, Rogers, Stark, Banner, Romanoff, and Barton are all children between the ages of six and ten...No, I don’t know what happened; none of them can remember. They’d successfully infiltrated the lab and secured the  _ doctor _ , when Rogers reported smelling something odd. They all mentioned the odd smell on their way out of the building, but Sterekson refused to admit to anything and Tony’s suit sensors found nothing strange enough to issue a warning. Of course, Tony has a tendency of opening his helmet after a fight so whatever was in the air could have gotten to him at that point. By the time we dropped off the prisoner, they were all complaining of feeling strange, which considering Rogers’ healing capabilities was even more concerning. We’d just gotten back to the safehouse when they...well, they started shrinking. The changes must have been too much for their bodies because they all wound up passing out. When they came to, they were mentally and physically children.”

Tony Stark, precocious and exceedingly curious even at a young age apparently, tapped his arm. “What is that? Are you talking to someone? Is that a phone? It doesn’t look like any phone I’ve seen. Did my dad make that? He makes lots of things. I like making things, but I’m going to make robots because they’re super neat! I’m hungry.”

Phil, trying to track through Tony’s ramblings, which he honestly didn’t know could be any worse, nodded and shook his head as needed. “Yes it is a phone, no your father didn’t design this, though he probably would have eventually. I’m talking to my boss right now, but I will try to find you guys some food. Let’s see if there’s anything in the kitchen, okay?”

Watching the kids storm into the kitchen, excitedly talking over each other about what their favorite foods were, Phil hissed into the phone, “Stop. Laughing. Mad scientists, no problem. Terrorists, piece of cake. Alien gods on a power trip, consider it taken care of. I do not handle  _ kids _ , Nick! Find someone to at least help me. I’m sure we’ve got an in-the-know babysitter somewhere. Look, do you  _ know _ what time of year it is? They go anywhere outside, turn on the television, or read a paper, they’re going to see. I can not handle five super powered and highly gifted children during Halloween, Nick! Nick? Nick, so help me, when I get back there...!”

**Author's Note:**

> Like my work? Curious about what other crazy ideas I've had? Check out my [plot bunny page](https://jujubunnies.freeforums.net/). You can comment on existing ideas or leave your own requests.


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